I tagged along with a friend to the park today. It's a pretty normal park but it is completely enclosed by a tall brick fence and on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, they have toys out for the kiddos to play with. The playground is in the grounds adjoining the orphanage and it's completely enclosed so little ones don't get lost. Which I'm sure is helpful when you have so many kids to watch after - or one extremely fast toddler who insists on doing all the things the kids twice her age - and then some - are doing.
Alessandra was busy running around, giving hugs to strangers, and getting in roll over accidents with her bobby car (don't worry she's fine - she just has a small scrape under her left eye - but boy was the crash impressive). I visited with my new friends the Quinns who will be leaving on Tuesday and some other English speaking parents.
Then out of nowhere I was thrown into a pretty uncomfortable place. One I haven't been in since right after Pearce was born.
One of the Dads asked if Alessandra was my second - which caught me off guard because it seemed like a weird thing to ask. He didn't ask if I had any other children or if Alessandra had any siblings, he asked if Alessandra was my second. I didn't know what to say. Mostly because I didn't want the rest of the afternoon to be about me and Pearce. Writing that makes my stomach hurt but it's the truth. I have a very short time with the Quinns and I didn't want to spend one of the only afternoons I'm going to have with them telling them about Pearce. I didn't want them to feel sorry for me, I didn't want it to be weird. So, I said "No, Alessandra's my first."
Why did I say that.
It isn't the truth.
She wasn't my first, she'll never be my first. She's my second but I didn't - no, I don't know what to say to acquaintances or strangers when they ask. I want Pearce to count. I want his little life to matter and today I didn't do that. It tears my heart out that I did that, and why, because it was a little more comfortable.
Well, I was wrong. It wasn't more comfortable. Because it's almost two in the morning and it's still the only thing I can think of. It just keeps playing over and over again in my head.
"No, Alessandra's my first."
"No, Alessandra's my first."
"No, Alessandra's my first."
Next time I'll tell the truth. Even if it is a little bit uncomfortable for a minute because in all actuality it probably would have only been a few minutes that we talk about my sweet boy. A few minutes to remember how much he blessed us. A few minutes...
Pearce - I'm sorry I didn't give you a few minutes. You deserved the entire afternoon, and next time I'll remember that.
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Friday, April 20, 2012
I wasn't too good for them and neither is Alessandra. The great thing about hand-me-downs is no matter how many people wore them before you there still new to you. I love hand-me-downs!
Here she is in her new duds we got from one of my friends here in Dusseldorf. Sad news about said friend. She is great and I really like her - we have kiddos pretty close to the same age and she's moving back to The States on Tuesday. UUUGGGHHH! I guess I'm going to have to find another new friend.
I think I mentioned before how much Alessandra loves dressing up. She's an equal opportunity dresser upper, and gives plenty of attention to her non cutesy, frilly, girly girl clothes too.
Here she is in head to toe pink. She is wearing her pink hat, pink rain pants (think unlined snow pants for playing in the rain/mud/wet sand) pink polka dot pants, and last but not least, pink footed pajamas.
Okay, so maybe a little bit cutesy and girly girl. ;o)
Monday, April 16, 2012
Alessandra has a favorite character from Sesame Street which is pretty funny because she hasn't ever seen Sesame Street. She does have one Elmo book though and she loves it. In fact she has the entire book memorized - which means I also have the entire book memorized. This comes in handy when she starts to get a little fussy on the tram because I can just recite the book and it usually gets her out of her funk. Here she is as Elmo in her performance of So Big.
For Easter Alessandra's Oma sent her a package and in that package was a pair of Elmo pajamas. We opened the box and she instantly fell in love. She wears the pajamas one way or another everyday - unless they're in the wash - and when I say wash I mean actually in the washing machine because she will dig through the dirty clothes to find it. As soon as they are out of the wash and hanging on the clothes rack she pulls them down and puts them on. She will wear these jammies as a hat, a scarf, and last but not least as a shirt and pants. The only way we can get her Elmo pajamas off after we've put them on is to bribe her with a bath. Here's a cute little video we did this morning and as you can see - she's wearing her favorite Elmie jammies.
I'm hoping to find my cord for my camera soon so I can start doing some "good" pictures again and not just bad cell phone pictures and videos. I have so many updates to get to you but life has been pretty crazy in the Eichelberger Haus lately.
Hope this little quick update finds you all well.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Yes, that is my entire family minus me in one chair.
Yes, as soon as I finished taking the picture I did take my place back under Jon's arm and Ripley.
Yeah, we need a couch.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Alessandra loves dressing up. She'll put on hats, scarves, and her tutu. On this particular afternoon she decided that we all needed to wear the hat. Here she is putting the hat on Ripley, Dotty, and me.
What I was hoping to catch was a video of Alessandra pushing her babies
(anything squishy with a face) around in her stroller.
About 15 minutes before I started filming Alessandra pinched her finger on the stroller and whenever she touched the stroller it would remind her of said pinching and she would start howling again. Okay - roll tape.
I can tell you one thing.
Living with a smart, strong willed, imaginative toddler is never boring.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
I promised Auntie Lisa we'd have a drink in her honor for her birthday.
So here it is - the dinner time production of "Cheers Auntie Lisa"
Please forgive the squeeky voiced singing and poor lighting.
And Auntie Lisa...